Econ Mom visits a doctor

I was feeling a bit breathless and wound up. From a variety of friends, I got only one response. “I think you’re working too hard. You need to relax.” And from the one quack in my life, Hubby, I got a variety of responses ranging from “It could be the pollen count” and “OMG, is it asthma?” and “You are working too hard” to “You need to talk less” and “You definitely need to argue less.” Hmmmm. Exactly the type of response that warrantees a good argument.

Anyway, upshot is that Hubby took me to an allergy specialist, who’d apparently cured him around 20 years ago, for an opinion. Hubby is choosy about his doctors. He doesn’t like most of them and feels that most don’t match up to his superior quack skills. But even quacks can be smitten. And Hubby loves this doc. After all of the medical faculty apparently failed to even identify the allergen that had struck Hubby 20 years ago, this good Doctor had breezed in and cured my quack.

And, a quack once smitten, is hard to cure. I have spent the past 14 years of my marriage hearing stories and stories about this Superman. Well, however, with no trace of allergy at all in both of us, except for the severe one which we developed for each other over a period of time, we never really had any reason to meet with Superman. But this time around, I had no option. Hubby was pretending to look quite worried about my breathlessness, but I am sure inwardly he was quite looking forward to meet the Messiah.

And so the great meeting happened. After 20 long years. I was relieved when Hubby didn’t breakdown or something and made some general wheezing noises to remind the two of my presence and the true reason of our visit.

Well, Doc got me talking. “And what do you do for a living, Manasi?” “Well, I’m an economist and…” “Really?” Doc looked up with a grimace. “Economist?” he said, with such apparent disdain that I was thrown off track from allergies and breathlessness issues.

“Why?” I asked a bit defensively. “Oh, nothing. Anyone with any heart disease/ history/ disorders?” Was the measured response. “No”, I answered grumpily.

“Oh, but your great grand-father died of a heart attack!” that was Hubby, determined to get some data for his fav Doc. “Yes, but that was not a disease. I mean, there was no history…” I faltered as Doc raised his eyes to the ceiling and said “Aaaaargh! Economists!”

Really, now this was too good to be ignored. The allergy doctor obviously has some kind of an allergy to economists and I am going to cure you before leaving, I grinned to myself.

But there was no time to cure him because he suddenly pushed a machine into my mouth instructing me to make rude blowing noises like a dying hen while inhaling and exhaling through the damn thing. Hubby was staring appreciatively at the whole process. It can’t get better for him, I thought grumpily. He’s reliving his past through these idiotic noises I’m making and is in the presence of his fav Doc and wife’s red in the face and looking like a fool. Oh, I’ll get you, I thought, blowing some more air with vengeance into the strange contraption.

After the ordeal was over and I was back to my calm and collected econ-self, I asked Doc, “Errr…so, do you have a problem with economists?”

Imagine my surprise when the guy said cool as a cucumber, “Well, I think they’re all crooks.” Now really!

He continued “Have you seen the Inside Story? Crooks, all of them. And when Raghu (first name basis with my fav Guv!) wrote a paper on it, they blasted it…”

“Larry Summers blasted it,” I said helpfully.

“Yes, him and the earlier Chairman.”

“Alan Greenspan,” chipped in Hubby, earning himself an appreciative glance from Superman.

Now Doc was getting into form. “Summers and Greenspan and Paulson. Oh, they created the problem. And then who was put in charge of solving it? Summers and Greenspan and Paulson! Crooks, all of them!”

Ok, now I know what’s wrong. My diagnosis was ready. “But Doctor, surely you are not going to base your opinion about economists based on one popular movie. I’ve read all the Robin Cook books and then that’d mean that I’d believe that all doctors are people with devious intentions out to genetically modify people or get their organs.”

“Hahaha, this is not a discussion of your profession vs. mine. Look at the results. Economists generally don’t seem to be able to diagnose the basic health problem properly is what I’ve noticed. Are we doing well in this country? Are we doing well anywhere? We seem to be breathless with problems.” Nice one, that! I like this guy.

“So Manasi, you’ve to see me again next week. It’s a nasty allergy, this one.”

“”Yes, Doc” I replied with an evil grin. “You’ve got a real nasty allergy. I’ll meet you again till I cure you completely!”


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